This is a topic of great discussion in the Massage Therapy field. I found during my research one particular individual that seemed to be forcing me to address this issue. I realized that the issue of what is offered during a massage therapy session and what is requested goes beyond the massage room. What I discovered spans our globe and victimizes some of the weakest and most vulnerable of our world.
In this individuals response to a post on female happy endings,he states,
“I enjoyed the article. Just returned from vacation in Thailand. I got used to paying $9 for 1 hour full body oil massage (I had 5 of them in 15 days). Since the girls wanted a good tip, they all teased me by rubbing the inside of my thighs, purposely grazing my a** and (scrotum). Eventually they all asked if I would like them to masturbate my c**k, which of course I did. None of them was good enough at it to make me orgasm, but I still gave them a good tip for trying. We both enjoyed a “happy ending.” Same thing is standard practice in Costa Rica when I visited in March. Philippines, Korea, etc.
Frankly, it’s culture shock to return home to the USA and have to deal with LMTs on their high horses. I have listened to their arguments and understand their reasons. They do NOT want to give their clients a happy ending and they do not want to be asked. BUT… many of their client WANT a happy ending and will continue to search for MTs who are willing.. I know I will”. Bill Sanders
I believe that we as Massage Therapist are tired of having our beautiful profession hijacked by ignorant, misinformed individuals.
Individuals who believe it is acceptable to commit a felony not only by soliciting someone for sex, but also for possibly having sex with minors.
Now you may be asking, when did he mention minors in his comment? When he stated that this occurred in Thailand.
Thai women and girls are trafficked within their own country and other countries like Japan, Malaysia, South Africa, Bahrain, Australia, Singapore, Europe, Canada and yes the United States for sexual and labor exploitation.
Thailand is a source, transit and destination country for human trafficking. This means that they use their women and girls for sexual and labor exploitation in their own country. And with the help of criminal syndicates see these women and girls, including women and girls from other countries, shipped into and through their country for the purpose of human trafficking.
Human trafficking is not limited to women and girls but also on a smaller scale affecting men and young boys as well. Notice that he mentions Costa Rica, Philippines and (South) Korea, all hold the same distinction as Thailand as being top human trafficking violators.
Many of these women and young girls are lured to other countries from their own through recruiting agencies with promises of a career and security and after arriving find themselves in debt and living the life of an exploited slave.
Let’s look at this from a historical standpoint. I have heard many times that prostitution is the oldest profession on earth. I would have to disagree, I believe that distinction belongs to hunting, farming, gathering. But I will agree that it has been around since the idea of “trade for goods” was established.
The first recorded history to mention prostitution is in the Code of Hammurabi in the 18th Century BCE, which included provisions to protect the inheritance rights of prostitutes, the only women other than widows who had no male support.
The Greeks established classes for the prostitutes of their land while state run brothels were established by the ruling Solon in the 6th Century, BCE.
These cultures differed from those like Spain, which banned prostitution in 590 ACE, or Italy in 1586 when Pope Sixtus V mandated the death penalty for acts of prostitution.
So from this we know there is an extensive history for prostitution with writings dating from the 18th Century, now we should have a brief history on Massage Therapy.
Massage Therapy has roots in the traditions of India, which were not recorded until sometime between 1500 and 500 BCE, but the deep history of this practice may go back to sometime around 3000 BCE or earlier. Hindus used this art in the holistic practice of Ayurvedic Medicine and still do today.
Egyptians are credited with the pioneering of Reflexology around 2500 BCE, including paintings on the walls of their burial tombs depicting massage as part of their medical training.
An invaluable tool in the massage therapy training field is a book from ancient China titled “ The Yellow Book of Internal Medicine”, first written around 2700 BCE and published in the English language in 1949.
Looking at the history and time lines for these two professions tells me they evolved alongside one another, but just because I evolved alongside a sea turtle does not mean that I should be considered the same, just as Massage Therapy should not be considered the same as prostitution.
Massage Therapist, just like other health care professionals, are held to very high ethical standards, established code of ethics and their own moral code which all agree that we are not to exploit our clients in any way including any sexual act of any kind. This does not make me an “LMT on my high horse”, It says I am an ethical professional who recognizes my role as a Therapist and my boundaries set under the current laws.
This is not a subject that is up for debate. Massage Therapist from California to Maine and all states in between are held to the same standards. We entered this field, not to be exploited, but to follow a path of health, healing and balance.
I want to make very clear that the United States is not exempt from any involvement in human trafficking, as I said before the United States is in the illegal import/export business of human trafficking as well.
In a recent news report from The Kansas City Star from August 27,2009:
“Police have arrested a Kansas man who is accused of helping run a network that brought teenage girls to brothels to perform sex acts.
Presley is one of six defendants who were indicted on accusations of running a human-trafficking network that brought teenage girls to Houston for prostitution”.
For those who believe it is a harmless thing to ask your Massage Therapist, who is educated and certified, to service you in some way out of their scope of practice remember this, she or he is a Therapist not a brothel worker.
So what can we do?
I have heard some say that prostitution should be legalized. Making a clear distinction between the two professions and those who work in their fields. I can agree to some degree on this. There are people, not being exploited under slavery, that are willing and able to offer this service to the public.
It could be regulated in a similar way to current Nevada law which was established in 1971 when it allowed brothels in specific areas of the state. Having enforceable laws for the protection of those involved is of paramount importance.
On an individual level you can address any questions of your scope of practice in a kind but informative yet firm manner.
As one Therapist said when I asked him about this subject and what his response to the client would be,
” The difference between myself and a ‘masseur’ that offers such things, I am a therapist. If I gave you the impression that I offer more than massage I apologize, but I am a serious professional and could not engage in illegal conduct. If you would like to continue the massage in the manner it is intended, we can, otherwise we will have to stop the treatment”. Darren Peck
He also said, “As male therapists, I think we see a lot less assumptions of our profession than female therapists do”. This is an excellent point because of the ties between illegal brothels disguised under massage parlor fronts predominately employing females. Another interesting point, Darren as a male Massage Therapist, still gets the “tongue in cheek comments”, those comments that every massage Therapist inevitably gets…
I received a response from a female therapist that really made the point clear and precise. I was happy to hear it stated so assertively from another woman. In her response to the question of how she feels about her field of choice being associated with prostitution she said,
“The assumption that a Licensed Massage Therapist would in any way be associated with prostitution is based on ignorance and the unfair social influence they have yet to think beyond. Everyone understands that a Fake Rolex is just that- A Fake. And a “Masseur” that has no education, no certification, no license and no respect for the work that real trained practitioners do – is not a Massage Therapist”.
From an individual perspective these are two responses that give you examples of how to address the issue both inside and outside of the massage room.
On a local level, good examples of getting the word out would be places of business offering safe, legal, Therapeutic Massage. These places can work with local government, serve and or participate in local business boards. While in those positions their voices will be heard loud and clear about the issue of prostitution and the association it has with the field of Massage Therapy.
On a national level we could encourage the AMTA and ABMP to establish a more precise defense for the profession itself. Encouraging ad campaigns that make it very clear that these two professions in no way have anything to do with one another.
On the AMTA web site it states,
“Legal recognition of massage therapy through licensure protects the public in other ways as well. It establishes a consistent standard of practice, which is enforceable by a professional code of ethics. In addition, it establishes a formal grievance process for consumers that helps prevent unethical and/or non-compliant massage therapists from continuing to practice”.
This is an excellent statement regarding their code of ethics that all Massage Therapist are required to adhere to, but in my opinion it falls short of taking a firm stand on the issue.
We are seeing more local governments enforcing the law in regards to illegal massage parlor fronts. It is a process that will require patience but when it is complete, I believe we could see respect being given to a field that, at its core, provides health, well being and therapeutic balance to all who seek its practice.
If you would like to learn more about human trafficking and its affects on a global scale, you can read more at:
Humantrafficking.org
As always, “Choose each day to be blissful and complete, a whole person well cared for by you”
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I am a massage therapist as well and feel the exact same way as you!
Thanks for the comment. There are a lot of us who feel this way.
Namaste, Punkie
Bravo. Well said. It is a matter of time and patience. In Canada there is a minimum requirement of 2200 hours or basically 3 years of education. My clients usually get the picture when I tell them that. Making the profession more difficult to enter helps maintain higher quality standards and a more professional image in the public’s eye. If we keep going in this manner and keep enforcing minimum requirements and standards across all fields, products and services, it will only be a matter of time until clients are shocked if anyone giving them a massage ever offers a “happy ending”
I look forward to those days, Ken. Thanks for the great comment.
Namaste
Nice article. But I don’t think that Korea is a hub of human trafficking. You might want to check your facts (or go ahead and cite some in the first place).
You may have North Korea and South Korea confused. North Korea is not listed as a human trafficking violator. This is an obvious fact for those who know the political climate of North Korea since the government will not allow the investigation required by any organization to compile the statistics.That being said if the investigation were allowed we could see the violations clearly. South Korea does in fact have quite a few strikes against them in this area, it is listed as a source, transit and destination country.
As I noted in the post, you can find more information about human trafficking on humantrafficking.org or follow this link directly to the page for the statistics and facts about South Korea.
If I had written all of the facts and statistics for all of the countries mentioned in the post it would have been much too long of a read, which is why the link was inserted for reference.
Thanks for your comment.
Great article on an important topic that’s rarely addressed this candidly and in this much detail.
Thanks for sharing your research with us.
Good article. And I think you get it right — if prostitution were legalized, this wouldn’t be a problem. Individuals who were of legal age and wanted to openly advertise this service could do so.
But in the uptight, Puritanical USA, this will probably never happens. And herein lies the problem, the “rub,” if you will allow me the pun.
There are a certain number of licensed massage therapists who are willing to provide a “happy ending,” an orgasm to their clients at the conclusion of the massage. Most reserve this sort of service for loyal and trusted clients, I would imagine.
I won’t speculate on percentages, etc. But I will tell you that personally, I have seen at least 10 LMTs over the past couple of decades that provided this service.
Yet, because this is illegal, they must maintain the “front” that they do not provide any such services. So they will still have signs in the lobby warning against unethical behavior, signs in the room telling clients that any sexual requests or inappropriate behavior will not be tolerated.
And yet, they still do it. Why? The obvious reason is bigger tips; men (including myself) are willing to pay as needed for these services. (And please note — I am referring only to manual stimulation, e.g. a “hand job.” Other activities which involve exchanges of bodily fluids are unsafe and are a different category of prostitution, in my opinion.)
Also, I think some LMTs see an orgasm as the natural conclusion to a massage, the most surefire way to encourage a complete relaxation of the human body. To me, a high-quality therapeutic massage concluded with an orgasm is one of the most serene experiences in life.
I do still see other LMTs who don’t provide “extras,” and I respect their boundaries and don’t attempt to push them. (Indeed, when I do find an LMT willing to provide extras, it is almost always him/her that makes the first move.)
But I find those massages are often unsatisfying, as I experience a degree of sexual arousal that makes relaxation nearly impossible. This is particularly true if the therapist spends time on parts of the body I happen to find erogenous, such as my thighs or abdomen. Often, I will masturbate myself to orgasm after the therapist has left the room and concluded the massage.
So while I understand your point that the ethics of your profession tell you that sexual contact is not allowed, many LMTs ignore that code of ethics and do it anyway. I believe that their own personal ethics tell override institutional ethics, and they don’t believe they are doing anything wrong. (Or, for a small minority, perhaps they do believe it is wrong, but they need/want the additional income.)
As I said, I’ve been getting massages for just over 20 years, all over the US. And I’ve consistently found a significant number of LMTs willing to provide happy endings. It’s not the majority of LMTs, at least in my experience. But I would say, just guessing, that 25-35% of LMTs I’ve known have been willing to provide that service. And of the remainder, some of them may have been willing to do so if I’d had the opportunity to become a more loyal and frequent client.
Just tossing my $0.02 in here, please feel free to flame away. But I do wish that providers of sensual massage could advertise their services openly. If they could do so, no one would ask the strictly therapeutic providers for these services. And wouldn’t that be best for us all?
You make a very good point. If we could legitimately separate the two professions it would be less confusing for the public. Your perspective is honest and well appreciated. Thank you Paul for adding your $0.02.
Namaste
I have family who are LMT’s and we all feel the same way about the ‘happy ending’, that being it’s beyond inappropriate. Besides being completely insulting and degrading to the therapist, it is illegal.
For example, when was the last time your doctor was cupping your balls, or performing a vaginal exam, and you figured you’d just ask, “Hey, why not just jerk me off since you’re already halfway there?”.
Ridiculous. Keep that image in mind next time you consider illegally sexually harassing the next LMT you encounter.
Great article, thanks for sharing.
I can well imagine that this is a real problem for massage therapists (especially in places where sexual services are illegal). I work as a male escort (in Sydney, Australia – where this is legal), with a special interest in massage and “happy endings”, so for me it is easy. My clients know what to expect and can ask for what they want.
Many massage therapists that I see advertising in Sydney explicitly state that their service is non-sexual. I think that this is a really good thing to do. Communication is the key here (as with so many things).
If a massage therapist is concerned about being expected to provide a sexual service, then just state upfront in your advert, reading material, sign on the wall, that your service is not sexual.
It seems like a simple and effective solution to the problem to me.
Hi John, Thanks for your comment, it is a simple and easy solution that can help other Therapist who do not offer ‘illegal’ services.
Namaste
I do not think this is about prostitution for everyone. The jury is out for me on legalizing prostitution, yet leaning towards legalization. To me, I believe a “happy ending,” (more like Yoni or Tantra in my way of thinking,) is an essential benefit to women who have had damaging experience relating to trust and their body. But being that this is a mans world, many abused women will go to their grave never having known their bodies intimate beauty, only the shame that is tattooed on their soul for having been abused. In reality, we are not much different than those who use “honor killings” as a way to curb female behavior. Thank God for the Bandit Queen!